Selfless Not Selfies

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Seeing Sandi suddenly take a turn for the worse put life into perspective.  There were times when I was angry, frustrated and feeling slighted by not having personal desires met. It makes me look at things differently when I see her struggling to get up, eat and drink. Finding the truth does this. For the longest time, I thought her chronic tiredness was mainly a result of her bad attitude.

That may have been part of it, but I learned, after she finished the more body draining chemo and after a year of less damaging Opdivo and after she just kept getting increasingly tired and uncooperative, it was the brain cancer.  She was diagnosed with lung cancer which also metastasized to the liver.

Brain was the first cancer treated when I took Sandi to ER after she felt like a hatchet was going through her head and spilled coffee at Code Blue, didn’t go in to eat with me in the morning, started taking her coat off after we got out of the car in freezing weather, threw up in the Levittown, PA public library and became very disoriented.

After the brain tumor was treated, and Sandi survived, except for minor problems, such as short-term memory loss, heavy chemo removed the rest of the cancer. It came back in the liver, but a year’s Opdivo treatment zapped the liver cancer, as if Packman was eating it.

Whew! I thought we were home free. But then a dramatic downfall. The cancer doctor explained that the brain cancer had been creeping back in, and now this seemingly sudden change. Awhile back she was walking on her own, going to community meals and to church with me. She got too tired to go any more and ended up having to use a walker. We did manage to visit relatives, one who had a lovable pit bull whom Sandi just loved. A few weeks ago, it took an hour or so to get her out of the car after seeing the doctor.  If it wasn’t for a good Samaritan, I don’t know what I would have done!

She was just one of many people who wander around Bucks County, PA who have no home to go to.

Seeing her now sleeping in a bed in a nursing home, nearly helpless, reminds me that people have intrinsic value, made in the image of God. We only have value because God created us from the clay of the earth and breathed life into us. Any gifts, skills God gives us is not for our own self-aggrandizement, but to be like Him and serve others.

For me, it’s a struggle to accept something like this happening to someone close to me. The Serenity Prayer comes to mind:

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference. Living one day at a time; enjoying one moment at a time; accepting hardships as the pathway to peace; taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it; trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His Will; that I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with Him forever in the next. Amen.”

Even when people create their own problems, we should still care about them. This doesn’t, of course, mean we enable destructive behavior. Not only would the enabling hurt society, but it also doesn’t help the person who engages in destructive behavior.

Do not snitch is a mentality found among the homeless community in Bucks County. The mentality is driven by the idea that you want to keep the peace and that people who report a criminal act are causing trouble. How about the victim? Hummmmm?

Recently, a drunken homeless woman suckered another homeless woman because she was allegedly running her mouth about someone being busted for drinking. If, as may be the case, the woman was not just talking about someone who is hurting others in the group, as was the case when a homeless guy who kept coming to meals drunk and causing problems, she had no business with the neh neh-neh neh neh verbalization of what happened. I can understand someone who is affected being angry about it, but the neh neh-neh neh neh remarks were not directly connected to the assailant. Maybe not directly, but the attacker may have taken this as a personal affront on people who get drunk.

This is similar to the written attack about a comment I made on someone’s Facebook page about a celebrity coming out of the closet and announcing he’s “gay”. I wrote “I wish these queers would stay in the closet.”  My detractors whined that I was affecting many people. Evidently, they thought that “being gay is OK.” Instead of defending my right to my opinion on her FB page, my FB and casual friend in real life told the politically correct Nazis “Jeff knows better.” I unfriended her on FB and in the real world. I have no plans to beat her up.

No matter what the reason, attacking people because you don’t like what they say lowers a person to the status of a wild animal! It also sends a poor message to the establishment. I heard that the authorities are not exactly going out of their way to bring the assailant to justice. I’ve compared the way the homeless are treated to the way blacks were treated during the Jim Crow South.

I remember seeing a movie about rock and roll legend Richard Penniman, aka Little Richard. His father was murdered by another black man. One of the characters said that “the police don’t care when one ni**** kills another ni****. ” This very well may be the case with this recent assault on a homeless woman by another homeless woman.

The Bucks County establishment thinks that homeless people are a bunch of drunks, thugs, druggies, thieves…, or as the old popular song goes “gypsies, tramps and thieves.”  Attacking each other, according to the elites, is simply what homeless people do. Wrong! Your status in life does not define you! You don’t have to believe, as Curly of The Three Stooges says, “I’m a victim of soy cum stances!”

https://www.bing.com/search?q=gypsies+tramps+and+thieves+song&FORM=EDGNCT

“As iron sharpens iron,
    so one person sharpens another” -Proverbs 27:17